I’m starting to understand poverty…

No, no need to be concerned about our lack of funds. It’s not our poverty I’m starting to understand. indeed, we are truly rich in all the ways that matter.

We have been living in Aranui for 8 months, the poorest suburb in Christchurch, as the newspapers delight in telling us, along with shots of rusty playground equipment and fast-food signs. We have been getting to know people, mainly through our kids’ friends, and I’m starting to understand what poverty can be. Continue reading

A new home

Since I last posted, we have had many changes with our family. We have moved to Christchurch! People ask, bemused, why? Well, I grew up here, and we are now close to Mm and my sister, so we are enjoying more family time, although learning new rhythms has been a  bit of a challenge. I hadn’t realised until we moved how isolated we were previously. Maybe having a house full of kids takes up all my attention and I forget to call anyone else!

I have also been continuing to feel God’s call to the priesthood, so I contacted Bishop Victoria, who invited me on a discernment weekend. She wants to see me established as a parishioner for six months before she will consider me for parish work, and priesting is a conversation to have further down the track.

This means that instead of writing sermons and leading services, I am a lady of leisure, and it’s a bit odd really. I hope, now that I have sorted out the computer which was clogged up with Nathan’s games, to be able to write regularly on this blog.

Meanwhile, I am trying to establish a  garden in our large but empty section, which has very sandy soil. I am also making a patchwork quilt for my son Morgan and his fiancee Becca. yay!

Blessings from Felicity

Refiner’s Fire

Refiner’s Fire

How are you going on your New Years’ resolutions? Are you keeping all those decisions to give up unhealthy food, exercise more, transform your life? No, I didn’t think so. Well, I didn’t even make any – you all know how I feel about exercise!

Are you ready for the Lord to come again? The prophet Malachi tells us that God will be like a furnace that purifies gold or silver, and that no one will be able to stand up to him. God’s purity is so intense that it will burn us, melt us, refine us.

Does that sound like a pleasant thing? No, it is downright scary,

if you think about the process of smelting silver, and Josiah has shown me a clip on you-tube where the fellow starts with a bucket of ore and ends up with a silver ring. Continue reading



It’s the wedding season! Have you been to a wedding yet this summer? Are you going to one in the next few months?Weddings can be exciting and romantic, but they can also bring out the worst in people. There are so many expectations about the day itself, and about the supposed perfection of the new spouse.But wedding days can be very stressful. Marriages can be a source of disappointment.

When I was 19, and my boyfriend said, how would you like to get married? I was on cloud nine! My feet didn’t touch the ground! I had a picture in my mind of my life, that getting married was what you did when you grew up, and everything would go fine from here. You see, I had the blessing of parents with a very healthy marriage. They were my main role model. I soon discovered that my marriage was not what I had hoped. I was always wanting more. Wanting more time and attention, wanting a fuller relationship. I had not taken into account my husband’s underlying problems, and I had no experience to deal with them.

Our Isaiah reading presents two possibilities – deserted and childless, or happily married. But I’m sure all of you know that there are many other options in relationships. How about married and childless? Married and lonely? Happily single? Unhappily married? to name just a few. 

But God presents both ends of the spectrum to us as a contrast. First, that sense of complete desertion, aloneness, having been let down and deserted by everyone, with no one to care for us in our old age. The other end of the spectrum is Happily Married – maybe it’s an aspirational state, but I think we all know what it can mean. That sense that when you walk into the room, your spouses’ eyes light up at the sight of you. Maybe that sense of companionship that means you don’t have to talk to communicate.

God wants that sort of relationship with us. We no longer have to feel deserted, as if there is no one one in the universe who cares about us. We don’t have to feel that when we die there will be no one to miss us, to mourn, or to carry on our legacy. God is always with us, filling our loneliness, caring for us, and God has human hands and feet, and arms. In those people round us, made in God’s image, we can find family, we can find children, we can find love. We all need each other.

These days, so much of our interaction takes place on a screen, with a keyboard, or a mouse, a stylus. Last week at prayers and squares, 6 of our kids were here, it being the school holidays. I looked in to the church to check up what everyone was doing, as they were very quiet, to see 6 young heads drooped over 5 small screens. I don’t think they were interacting at all! This is a very real danger in our technological world, that we spend all our time on line, and forget how to look someone in the eye, how to smile a them, how to hug them. We all share the Peace very enthusiastically here at St Mary’s hugging and talking to everyone. It’s often a bit of a challenge to get everyone ready to sing the offertory hymn actually! But how about when you go home? Do you spend many hours with a screen in front of you? God wants us to give more of ourselves to each other.

The other end of the spectrum from Deserted and Childless in our Isaiah reading is Happily Married. Isaiah predicts for the people of Israel a time when God will be so near to them that they are like a happily married couple. You know the sort, that finishes each others’ sentences, that knows when to give each other a bit of space, that loves each other unconditionally, even when provoked and grumpy. This does not mean that you have to be happily married to enter the kingdom of heaven. No no no. It refers to a type of loving relationship that we can have with God if we let God in, and that means letting other people in.

Churches have often been very much centred around the family, and single people and people without children have often felt like they just didn’t fit in. But we don’t need to have our neat and tidy family along the pew next to us to belong to the kingdom of heaven. I haven’t got a neat and tidy family anyway, mine are challenging and all over the place at times. It’s people outside the church who are quick to look at the family life of Christians, and say, ooh look, the pastor’s teenage daughter is pregnant, what sort of an upbringing must she have had? The pastor must be a hypocrite.

No, the pastor is a human being, and so is her daughter. I’ve found that when I first meet people outside the church, and tell them I am a minister, they can be a bit inclined to sit up straighter, try visibly to not swear, and look a bit uncomfortable. But if I give them a bit of my story, such as saying that I was divorced, or a single mum for some time, they relax, knowing that my life has not been (and still isn’t, I might add) squeaky clean. As if such things matter. What matters is loving God, following Jesus, and showing others Jesus’ love.

Today’s Gospel is the great story of the wedding at Cana, often used to illustrate how much God values marriage, by showing us Jesus’ first miracle in the setting of a wedding. In the Jewish society Jesus lived in, marriage was very important, but it’s the hospitality side of the wedding feast that is the main point of this miracle story. The wedding had taken place, the couple were legally married and would still have been if the wine had run out. But providing generous hospitality was a high value in the prevailing culture. The hosts would have lost face, reputation, and community standing if they had run out of wine.

Let’s look again at what Jesus did. He took water that was used for purification rites, and transformed it into wonderful wine. We use the phrase in the prayer book, ‘making ritual water Gospel wine, cleansing all our worship.’ Here we see the water of a religious ritual, something that was required, a legality, if you like, being transformed into something wonderful, rich and intoxicating, and having a different effect on us. We must allow God to transform our rituals from being a long tall drink of water, to the heady richness of wine, allowing the Holy Spirit to transform us.

I hope there’s no cop breathalysing us on the way home today…

Only then when the Holy Spirit’s power is transforming us, does it ‘cleanse all our worship’. And that doesn’t just mean the part of our lives that is Sunday mornings. All our lives can be lived as worship, every relationship, every encounter, as we see the face of Jesus in all those we meet. Then the marriage metaphor can be fulfilled, that we are joined into the kingdom of heaven, as in a happy marriage!

Look Busy!

Advent Sunday

St Mary’s Whitby

There’s a bumper bar sticker I saw somewhere that says, Jesus is coming, look busy!

That is a great metaphor for this time of year isn’t it? In some ways we don’t have to pretend to be busy because with our southern hemisphere end of year coinciding with the Christmas season, most of us have no choice but to be busy. Very busy. I don’t know about you, but I always have to take a deep breath when I start putting all the November and December things into the calendar. There are end of year concerts and performances, school prize-givings and breakups, work dos, lunches and morning teas and afternoon teas and drinks and suppers for all the groups we belong to. No, we don’t have to just look busy, many of us are way too busy already.

We can try and make it easier – I try and count up how many plates I will need to produce over the next few weeks, and do a big batch of vanilla truffles to keep in the freezer, ready to hand out to the next child who says , oh mum, I forgot to tell you, there’s a shared morning tea today. Continue reading

The Ten Commandments and the Rich Man

The Ten commandments and the Rich Man.

Oct 11 St Mary’s Whitby.

When we hear today’s gospel story of the rich man’s encounter with Jesus, it starts with a sideways twist doesn’t it? The man called Jesus Good teacher, probably just as a way of addressing him. He could have called him Jesus Bar-Joseph, or Rabbi, or even Galileen. But he said Good teacher, as a throwaway greeting, just like calling someone dear sir. It wasn’t meant to be anything much. But Jesus took it out of left field, as he so often does. Maybe Jesus discerned a sarcasm in the address? or a condescension? I remember the series of Yes Minister, which we still watch sometimes, and Sir Humphrey had an annoying way of addressing all women who had the temerity to question him as ‘dear lady’. It always sounded patronising and dismissive.

But if this is what was happening between the rich man and Jesus, Jesus saw through it immediately, and put the focus back on God. ‘Only God is good’, he said.

After that he addressed the question,’What can I do to have eternal life?’ Rather than telling the man to have faith in him, he reminded him about the ten commandments. Now this might seem rather odd, but remember that this is Mark’s gospel account, and it is full of examples of what is called the messianic secret. “Don’t tell anyone” is a common refrain.

So Jesus reminds the young man about the ten commandments, and the fellow affirms that he had always followed them. But Jesus looks closely, and reminds him not to defraud. I suspect Jesus knew that the man was rich not merely through hard work, good luck and family connections. He knew he was overly attached to his wealth.

I follow a blog called Gifts in Open Hands , and this week there was posted a version of the ten commandments, which goes beyond the words to the intent.

It’s really good so I will read all of it out:

I am God of a World Communion – don’t put any of your little particular religions between you and God.

Don’t make idols of race or money or power or national identity and bow down and worship them.

Don’t make a wrong use of God’s name to justify your own ideas or your politics or even your interpretations of the Bible.

Remember that Sabbath means that you should rest your body, mind, and spirit and that you should create a society in which affordable rest care is a primary agenda for all people.

Honor all the elderly, listen to their wisdom and care for their wellbeing, for this is the only way to receive a heritage.

You shall not kill with your death penalty. You shall not kill by letting guns be unconscionably accessible to those ill of mind and spirit. You shall not kill migrant children for lack of a welcome. You shall not kill by starvation unnecessary in a world of abundance. You shall not kill by war.

You shall not commit abuse in loving relationships, permit human trafficking, forbid love.

You shall not lie about the earth and that which damages it. You shall not lie in negotiations between nations, in the emissions of corporate greed, in the paying of the taxes that sustain a common life. You shall no longer lie about the past for our indigenous, aboriginal, native brothers and sisters are weeping. You shall not swallow lies about the present, neither in congress or in court. You shall not invent lies about the future that steal our children’s world.

And hardest of all in an era so divided between rich and poor that the rich always serve a gold-calf brunch to their friends with someone else’s ewe lamb, you shall not covet what your neighbor has, because wanting what someone else has tears the world’s communion to pieces, and breaking bread is meant to be a blessing to share.

Jesus is calling the man to examine his deepest-held treasure. As we heard in the Hebrews reading, Jesus understands every weakness of ours, because he was tempted in every way that we are.

This could come as a bit of a scary thought, that Jesus can see through our bluster and our exterior, to the inner workings and idols of our heart, even when we can barely articulate them ourselves. Nothing is hidden from God.

But it’s not scary, it’s open and loving. A parent loves and cares for a baby even at its most revolting – nappy-changes become a loving act. God loves us the same way.

It takes courage on our part to allow God to search our hearts in the way that the epistle writer urges.

‘Whenever we are in need we should come bravely before the throne of God.’ Yes, it won’t be easy. Yes, we need courage. But committing to any loving relationship takes courage doesn’t it?

Job had courage didn’t he? He complained to God that he had been made to suffer. He had the open, loving relationship with his God that meant he didn’t have to hide his most unseemly emotions. He trusted that God would listen to him, because he is innocent!

We can come to God with our anguish even when we aren’t innocent!

My friends, isn’t it marvellous that we don’t have to have all our ducks in a row before coming to God? Isn’t it wonderful that we are loved with an unconditional, sacrificial love, no matter how terrible we feel we are, how unworthy?

Now, if God loves us like this, and urges us to be real with him, surely we need to love each other in the same way. Surely we need not fear ridicule or scorn from our fellow Christians, no matter what a mess we are in?

Many young people in their teens start to notice that Christians don’t all follow the same agenda. Some are judgemental, some hypocritical, some – gasp – human. And young people, who can be so idealistic, so passionate but at the same time powerless, often decide that all of religion is more trouble than it’s worth. People have killed, tortured, crusaded in the name of religion, so it’s a better bet to just reject all religious expression.

But Jesus has been misrepresented by his followers. The Jesus who could look at the rich man who asked how to inherit eternal life, and love him. He didn’t reject him because he was wealthy or successful, or even because his wealth may have been gained at others’ expense. Jesus loved him, because that’s what Jesus is about. Loving us all, and giving us the model for how to love each other.

Jesus did however have a challenge for him, to give away all his wealth to the poor. Jesus knew where his idol was.

I wonder if that was the end of the story? Maybe the rich man thought about Jesus’ words, and the phrase about not cheating people started to niggle like a prickle in his foot, and his conscience was changed? I hope so.

Let’s come back to Job. Job knew that God was always at work, even though he couldn’t see him. He knew that God could hear him, and would do exactly what he pleased. But Job also knew that when he was tested he would be found pure as gold. He had a clear conscience, so he could approach God and say, this isn’t fair, there is no reason for me to be judged. I am innocent!

He refused to be silent, even though God had ‘covered him in darkness’.

Shall we refuse to be silent too? Shall we stand up on behalf of those who cannot cry out? Shall we oppose human trafficking, slavery, greed, all the ways of the world which make life hard if not impossible for some of God’s beloved children?

I believe that we must. God sees everything in the world, and it breaks his heart. we must allow our hearts to be broken too, because we are made in God’s image.

Last week’s sermon about the Barnabas fund opened our eyes to the plight of Christians fleeing war in Syria, and the injustice that means they don’t have access to refugee services, because of fears for their safety. We have seen it, we can’t un-see it. Have you signed the petition in the foyer? What else can you do to help these people?

Go back to the rich man. He knew the basis for a Godly life – he had followed the commandments since his youth. This week and next encourage you to ponder on one commandment at a time, its wider implications, and what it can mean for you and your life, and your sphere of influence – your work, your family, your facebook friends, and all the ways you can be a blessing to the world.

Sermon: Truth



Our three readings today are on the same theme – the theme of truth. Esther spoke the truth to the king, even though it would mean exposing an influential enemy. The king himself was so powerful that Esther and Mordecai waited till they knew for certain that he meant what he said when he proposed to give her what she asked for. But even the king didn’t know what the evil Haman was plotting behind his back.

These days with the second world war in our recent history, we tend to forget that anti-Semitism went back a long way. A very long way. That may have had something to do with the fact they kept conquering other peoples maybe?

But here in King Xerxes’ court, in the land of Persia, the Jews were a minority who were resented. Esther had an opportunity to help her people, but it must have been with fear and trembling that she exposed Haman for plotting against her people. From our reading today it looks as if the king acted without any time to give Haman a chance to give his point of view, but a few verses were left out. What happened next, after Esther’s accusation, was that the king was so angry he got up and paced around. Haman, terrified for his life, threw himself at the feet of Queen Esther to plead for his life. The King returned and found him there, and accused him of trying to molest Esther! So Haman’s face was covered – meaning he was sentenced to death.

This is when the servant Harbona pipes up with the detail of the tower that Haman has built for the express purpose of hanging Mordecai, Esther’s cousin and leader of the Jewish people. This came as an extra accusation of Haman.

I’m left here wondering why the King didn’t know about the building project. After all, it was 23 meters tall. But maybe no-one dared speak against Haman because of his powerful position in the court.

This goes to show that even the King, the highest status person in the land, didn’t know everything. I hope my kids don’t hear me say this…

These events are still celebrated by orthodox Jews in the feast of Purim, and they make a special biscuit, called Haman’s hats – a three-cornered pastry filled with apricots, poppy-seeds or prunes, and they are very nice too!

But what message is there for us in this vivid story of life a long time ago? I think it’s about speaking out the truth, even as a potential risk to your own safety. Truth is a powerful thing, but so is untruth.

When we look at our reading from James, the message is very clear, to the point of almost naive bluntness. If you have trouble, pray. If you have sinned, tell each other what you have done.

It’s refreshing in its simplicity, and also challenging. Often-times we are so caught up in maintaining our image the way we want to be perceived, that telling our friends when we have done something that we consider a sin, is the last thing we would want to do. We don’t want our darkest secrets out on public view. Let bygones be bygones, it was just youthful high-jinks, the pig consented, and all manner of other excuses.

But have you ever had something in your past that gets up and niggles at you from time to time? Something you wish you could confess, to take away its power over you? But did you feel that if you did confess it that someone would have a lower opinion of you? I know I have, but I’m not willing to go into details. And this is the problem isn’t it? If we can’t bring our humanness, our brokenness, to our friends in Christ, we are not living with the freedom that James knows is possible. The truth will set you free! Free from guilt, from worry, from trying to make sure the story is straight, and everything looks respectable.

But, actually, being a Christian is not really about being respectable in the eyes of the community. Was Jesus respectable? He lived rough, bludged off -maybe that’s a bit strong- various unattached women, a motley crowd of disciples following him, turned over tables in temples, spoke it as he saw it…

Another good learning from James. If you have sinned tell one another what you have done, then pray for one another and be healed. Not gossip it all over the suburb or facebook. I’m sure none of you gossip. But it can be very tempting to pass on interesting bits of information, like Harmona and Haman’s new-built gallows! Note too that the prayer James urges is mutual, not just praying for the confessor, but for each other. In these ways are truthful relationships forged.

Let’s look again at the peaceful and simple picture James paints – pray for healing, and expect it! Give thanks for the good stuff! If you are sick, ask the church leaders to come and pray for you. In St Mary’s many of us exercise a healing ministry, and while that doesn’t mean we are all church leaders – relax, you don’t all have to go to Synod next year – we are growing in leading the Kingdom of God in our community. As we pray for each other in church, corporately and personally, we are being trained to pray for those we encounter on our Monday to Saturday journeys. We hear stories in Encouraging the Kingdom of when people step out boldly and simply and pray for others. Be encouraged everyone – it’s not hard, but like Esther you have to take your heart in your mouth sometimes.

Notice one thing James doesn’t say in his advice – if you do this life will be easy and go well and everyone will love you!

No no no, we all know that Christianity is not as easy as that. If it was, we would value it less, because it would come at a small cost.

Thins which are costly are valued – that’s why giving away pets in never as good as selling them – if a person values the new pet enough to sacrifice for it, they will care for it better.

In Mark’s Gospel, again we have the theme of truth. The disciples are complaining that someone else is casting out demons in Jesus’ name, someone who isn’t one of the approved, certificated, health and safety stamped members of the disciples. But Jesus knows that the message is what matters. The truth is that in Jesus’ name demons will flee.

That means that anyone who commands them to go in Jesus’ name speaks the truth and the demons will indeed flee. This is a message for all of us – as I mentioned last time I preached here, the enemy is real, but in Jesus’ name we all can command it to go. The truth rests in Jesus, human and divine son of God, and as His followers, slaves of Christ, which is what Christian originally meant, we are endeavouring to live the truth the Jesus way.

Does that mean then that if we discover in our conscience one of those sins mentioned in James, we should cut off the offending limb that committed the sin? Some people who take the Bible literally may think this. But the Bible was not meant to be taken literally in this way. The New Zealand sense of humour is about understatement – though I have not yet heard the Christchurch earthquakes referred to as ‘a spot of bother, ‘ you know what I mean. In the same way Jewish humour is about exaggeration. Jesus talked elsewhere about forgiving a debt of many talents of money, 0r several billion dollars in today’s terms. Cutting off your hand, foot, eye, is the same thing here. But the principle is clear.

Maybe it’s about things in your life. ‘Fred is my right-hand man at work, I couldn’t do without him.’ But if Fred encourages you to sin, maybe it’s time to sever the relationship.

If you need a glass of wine to get through the dinner hour when the kids are feral, maybe this is something to cut off before it leads you to sin.

Behaviours, habits, relationships that are bad for us, are all things we can cut off. Will it hurt? Yes. Maybe, like some amputations, there will be ongoing ghost pain too. But it’s for the better.

But there are times when we drift into a way of living that is not good. We don’t notice the first step, or brush aside the niggles, justifying ourselves until we no longer hear the whisper of the Holy Spirit that there is a better way. This is when our friends have a role in our life. James tells us that if any followers have strayed from the truth, try to lead them back. He doesn’t say, pray for them and everything will be fine, like in the earlier verse. He is acknowledging that it may be a difficult and painful journey for all parties involved. But this is love isn’t it? Speaking into the lives of our fellow Christians, with love, and with prayer, not just wringing our hands and worrying. In our culture people are reluctant to say anything, but, just like the servant Harbona, we have certainly become aware of the giant scaffold our friends are building, and as followers of the Truth personified in the person of Jesus Christ, we are emboldened to speak out.

This applies to structures in our communities too. If we see injustice, lack of truth, as Christians it is our duty to do something about it. Yes we may be ridiculed, so what? We only live here on this earth for a short while, but forever in heaven.